I Can See Clearly Now… But at What Cost?

Pulse Perspective by Brian Valencia

I just have one question. What's the issue with glasses, am I right? Any glasses wearer knows how annoying it is to wear them. I swear, I can't complain about them without someone saying, "buy contacts," like bruv, my insurance doesn't cover them. I'm broke, honey. It leads me to my next subject.

The Struggle

Every day, I wake up with 480p pixel vision. It would be so cool to get laser surgery, but have you seen what they do? Don't quote me, but they laser off a small slice of your eyeball. That's wild, and I won't be doing that. 

I think we all went through similar phases with glasses. Nobody talks about this. Here are a few in no particular order.

“I look better without them."

The issue with this stage is that nobody cares. Glasses eventually become an extension of you when you're older. Most glasses wearers like to take them off for photos, which I always find funny. Besides the dumb glare in the photo, most people recognize you with them on. "Oh my gooooosh, I didn't recognize you." Whatever, Becky. 

Anyways, I'm in the group of people who think he looks handsome without them. I take them off when dancing in the mirror. Eventually, you accept it and let people take their BeReal of you with glasses.

Goggles

This isn't everybody, but I've definitely talked to "glasses people," and this is a semi-common theme. I greet my brothers and sisters who are past this stage. Unless you're a kid or an active athlete, please stay away from them. You look like a dork.*Drops mic*

Finding Your Style… Finally?

It takes everyone until their late teens or early adulthood to settle into their preferred glasses style. It takes a minute to get there. We've all gotten wireframes, tick frames, etc. It takes a while until you find your preferred eyewear. Personally, I was 19 until I was finally happy with my selected glasses. 

But Brian, why "... finally?" Well, child, one thing about settling for what you like is branching out. Once you finally know what you like, it's easy to buy something different and like it instantly. You no longer have to cringe at old photos.

I might try those “Harry Potter”-looking ones next. Why not? I can change my style every few years—self-expression, baby. I'll like them because I don't hate the wireframe look on myself. I've owned so many glasses I know what looks stupid on my face. I've finally figured out my style, even if it changes every few years. 

Moral Of The Story

The moral of the story is don't buy goggles, ya dork.